My husband is an Indian, he is Telugu and he’s from Hyderabad more specifically Telangana, the twelve-most populated state in India. Our relation was in a long-distance relationship for 3 years and we got married in 2015. So what is it like to have a mixed marriage (Indonesian-Indian)? Here I tell you my side of the story.
The first thing that is so hard is food. Honestly, I don’t cook, my beloved mom always cooks for me or I will eat outside. I cook instant noodles only and water for my coffee (LOL). Yet, my husband’s family is the one who likes to eat at home, the family that always cook every day. What co-incident!
So, because of that, my husband doesn’t like to eat out. For me, cooking was so hard, harder than chewing a rock. I don’t know about other Indians, but my husband’s tongue is so into Indian food, so either I want or not, I should cook and that too Indian food.
I still remember the first time I cooked chicken curry, the taste was like garbage mix with the rotten chicken intestine, and because there is nothing else to eat, we manage to eat that even it was so disgusting. Haha. Now I can cook almost all kinds of Indian food, after a whole lot of time I spend to watch Indian recipe videos on YouTube.
I would say the tradition will be slightly different between me and my husband but not that significant. Because if we see from the history India was the one who brought so many things to Indonesia long – long ago.
Indian traditionally cure everything with turmeric and I was so amazed how much he uses turmeric every time he has injured himself and the injury cured. One day my baby was constipated, she didn’t have any bowel movement for around 2 days and he called his mom. His mom said “put some tamarind in her butt”, and I was like “whaat?”. I did it tho because I respect my mother-in-law and I just wanna know if it is worked. Yep, it needs time but it worked. Some small things like this make me feel amazed at how they still hold into something so nature where I will be just went to a drugstore and get some medicine over the counter.
My husband is so nationalist and I am not so much. Probably in India, the folks love their country so much and they stand for it. I used to be amazed by how other country is nicer and look so wonderful than my own country, but not my husband. He’s not into other countries look nicer. He always reminds me of the history of how Indian threaten by a particular country and makes India so crushed into pieces.
Instead, my mindset was like how other countries are nicer and cleaner than Indonesia, even Indonesia has everything. You name it, we have it.
India to Indonesia is not so far but not that close too. So it’s not like I can go every time anytime. Currently, we are living in New Jersey because my husband has to work here for several years. So my family is in Indonesia, my husband’s family is in India and we are in the USA. It’s quite though tho because if we have to go either India or Indonesia, is not close and needs a lot of money and time to spare.
Mixed Marriage Documents
As a mixed marriage country, we got a lot of documents, from visa until something we don’t even know exist. Just be prepared for that if you are going to marry someone from abroad. Once he/she forgot one document to bring in the marriage court than the marriage should be pending and it is not good for health and mind.
But above all, I am so grateful to have a husband like him, because he just never takes my anger seriously, even sometimes it so annoying but I think that what makes us unite. Hopefully, he stays like that forever.
Are you guys going to have mixed marriage? or you one of us? How do you feel about it? How do you solve the mixed country issue? I’d love to hear that. Leave your story in the comment below.