My husband is an Indian, he is Telugu and he’s from Hyderabad more specifically Telangana, the twelve-most populated state in India. Our relation was in a long-distance relationship for 3 years and we got married in 2015. So what is it like to have a mixed marriage (Indonesian-Indian)? Here I tell you my side of the story.

 

family

The Food

The first thing that is so hard is food. Honestly, I don’t cook, my beloved mom always cooks for me or I will eat outside. I cook instant noodles only and water for my coffee (LOL). Yet, my husband’s family is the one who likes to eat at home, the family that always cook every day. What co-incident!

So, because of that, my husband doesn’t like to eat out. For me, cooking was so hard, harder than chewing a rock. I don’t know about other Indians, but my husband’s tongue is so into Indian food, so either I want or not, I should cook and that too Indian food.

I still remember the first time I cooked chicken curry, the taste was like garbage mix with the rotten chicken intestine, and because there is nothing else to eat, we manage to eat that even it was so disgusting. Haha. Now I can cook almost all kinds of Indian food, after a whole lot of time I spend to watch Indian recipe videos on YouTube.





 

The Tradition

I would say the tradition will be slightly different between me and my husband but not that significant. Because if we see from the history India was the one who brought so many things to Indonesia long – long ago.

Indian traditionally cure everything with turmeric and I was so amazed how much he uses turmeric every time he has injured himself and the injury cured. One day my baby was constipated, she didn’t have any bowel movement for around 2 days and he called his mom. His mom said “put some tamarind in her butt”, and I was like “whaat?”. I did it tho because I respect my mother-in-law and I just wanna know if it is worked. Yep, it needs time but it worked. Some small things like this make me feel amazed at how they still hold into something so nature where I will be just went to a drugstore and get some medicine over the counter.




 

Mindset

My husband is so nationalist and I am not so much. Probably in India, the folks love their country so much and they stand for it. I used to be amazed by how other country is nicer and look so wonderful than my own country, but not my husband. He’s not into other countries look nicer. He always reminds me of the history of how Indian threaten by a particular country and makes India so crushed into pieces.

Instead, my mindset was like how other countries are nicer and cleaner than Indonesia, even Indonesia has everything. You name it, we have it.

 

Distance

India to Indonesia is not so far but not that close too. So it’s not like I can go every time anytime. Currently, we are living in New Jersey because my husband has to work here for several years. So my family is in Indonesia, my husband’s family is in India and we are in the USA. It’s quite though tho because if we have to go either India or Indonesia, is not close and needs a lot of money and time to spare.




 

Mixed Marriage Documents

As a mixed marriage country, we got a lot of documents, from visa until something we don’t even know exist. Just be prepared for that if you are going to marry someone from abroad. Once he/she forgot one document to bring in the marriage court than the marriage should be pending and it is not good for health and mind.

But above all, I am so grateful to have a husband like him, because he just never takes my anger seriously, even sometimes it so annoying but I think that what makes us unite. Hopefully, he stays like that forever.

Are you guys going to have mixed marriage? or you one of us? How do you feel about it? How do you solve the mixed country issue? I’d love to hear that. Leave your story in the comment below. 




 

In this era where Instagram is the most social media platform to use by people in the world, no wonder we want to put our best picture with the kiddos. But not all kids will stay put and do as our desire yet you should not be sad. They are kid, they don’t concern about their appearance on social media (like us). Here is how to take Instagram pictures with your kiddos even you are not a photographer.

 



Prepare for the distraction

Some kids they just can’t help it to sit down for a sec and see the camera, so what you need to do is a distraction to make them sit down or to make them in the position you want it, like running or jumping, etc.

Anin-on-the-snow
Anindya sitting on the snow (Winter 2019)

Let them play on snow and you keep clicking the shutter button till you get the perfect shot. Some pictures will not be as good but that’s okay, you can always delete them and try again.

 




Keep taking the picture

As I mention above, keep taking the picture when your kid is doing something, you will get the best shot by the end of the day.  Try to call their name too and when they see the camera click the shutter button as much as you can. If you are taking the picture by using DSLR camera, it has multiple shutter in one click, some even have more than 11 pictures in a second.

Anindyas-3rd-birthday
Anindya’s 3rd birthday
(August 2019)

Practice makes perfect

The more you taking your kid picture the more they know how to pose, and the more you know the right angle and the right time to take their picture. I didn’t know how to take Instagram pictures long ago, but practice makes perfect.

before-after

 

Take candid picture

Be ready and take when the time is there, but the time never come. Your kid always away from camera when you call their name. Well the only solution is take their picture when they don’t know you took their pictures.

candid-picture 

Have a camera

Some of us want the best for our kids and one of the things we can do to take the best picture is asking a pro photographer to take your kid picture with their high end camera gear and a strong cash in your wallet. But for me I chose to buy a DSLR and just learn by my self, cause kids they are growing so fast and I don’t want to miss a moment with them. So buying a camera is a must for me. These days DSLR camera is not costly anymore you can buy second hand one or even new one around $300 like canon rebel t6 or if you want the smaller one you can have mirror-less camera like canon m100

 

Please note that having camera is not the only way, you can have with you phone camera too, just the quality will be a lot different.




 

Be normal it is only Instagram

And yes mom and dad! Relax.. it’s only Instagram. Don’t be jealous if your friends have more gorgeous kid picture than yours, everyone has their own capability and choice. So relax and watch them grow naturally and happily. 

 

And that’s How to Take Instagram Pictures for Your Kiddos. Save as much as picture you could, cause they grow so fast. By no time you realize they become teen and only want to spend their time with their friends. The key is put the goal in your heart that those picture is for you and your kid memories, and famous in Instagram is just bonus. Don’t put pressure to your kid when you want to take their pictures, it is not a good idea to have a force smile. Taking picture of our kids suppose to be fun and enjoyment for memories when we get old.

 

How about you mom and dad, do you have other tips when you take your kids picture? Leave them in the comment bellow and let’s spread this fun. 




One day you go to school and you forget to comb your hair, then your classmate mocked you like anything, you go home sad and feel miserable and you end up in depression. Well, it just one single example of what these days people are having. The feeling of being judged and not worth it made a lot of people lose even their life. Why does this happen? Here are 5 Reason Why You Become Miserable and How To Avoid It




Thinking too much of unnecessary thing

thinking
Thinking too much of unnecessary thing

Some of us just have too many times to think some unnecessary things. Things like which red lipstick should I use today? What if this rose red does not blend into the condition in my office? How about the red nude lipstick, oh no it’s too flat and bla.. bla.. bla..

Just for deciding things that actually has no effect in your friendship or even in your life instead, it will be taking your productive time and your good mood away. So how to avoid thinking too much of unnecessary thing? Earlier it will be hard, nothing is so easy in the beginning. Especially when you change your behavior but it doesn’t mean you can’t. Try to be simple. Remember sometimes less is more. We don’t need to be the best just to please other eyeballs. 

Feeling unsatisfied for everything

unsatisfied
Feeling unsatisfied for everything

After you think too much then you will feel unsatisfied with whatever you’ve done. Some people feel unsatisfied because they can’t achieve as they expected. What do you need to do when you feel unsatisfied? First just stop thinking about it for a while. Take some break from it. When you have a break from this feeling you will be more grateful with whatever you have. More grateful so you won’t become miserable.




Social Media

social-media
Social media

Social media, if you take the positive vibe it will be good for you. Getting more and more ideas for your life but, if social media makes your life become miserable, why should you use it. Like you see your friend’s traveling picture and you were sad because you can’t be like that. Or you see your friend’s so popular and you just a regular person then you feel so miserable. That’s the negative side of social media. You can still enjoy social media but make a limit, don’t be too much watching other peoples’ lives cause it will make us feel ungrateful.

You take everyone’s opinion on you and you save it deeply in your mind

opinion
Taking everyone’s opinion on you

Well, we can’t avoid some people that are so mean to us and we can’t also decide what people want to say. We can’t decide everyone like and love us. Everyone has their own opinion about other. We should have the filter for it. When someone said bad about us, let them talk whatever they want, don’t put their opinion as your base of life. There’s a difference between critics and insult and all of that will depend on us. When they tell you that you are ugly, then just ignore it. They know nothing about you and you don’t deserve their negative word. When someone said “you will be nice if you wear pink” it doesn’t mean you have to wear pink. It just what people want in their eyes. So you need to build a filter for your mind, which one is good to take and can make your life upgraded, which one is just people want you to feel miserable. 

You chose to be down and break

down
You chose to be down and break

Well as I said before you need to have a filter for your life. That filter is you as the one and only that will choose it. We can’t stop people being rude, every corner on earth you will find this type of person. It will be ourselves that choosing will be drowned in their negative words or we keep going and show them they are wrong.

Some people will come to you and said “ugh. look at your double chin, it’s huge”. So what? We are human we have a chin.  Or you will come home running into your bedroom and seeing your chin and cry and don’t wanna eat until you lose that double chin.




We can’t always hold our emotion to be happy and strong, sometimes we get to the point where we are sad and feel like no one likes us. That has no problem with it because we are human. God gives us feeling to feel the emotion, but it doesn’t mean we have to drown in sad and feel miserable. Keep in mind that we can keep going when people don’t like us. We live not for pleasing every eyeball in this world.

Alright, those are 5 reasons why you become miserable and how to avoid it. Do you ever feel so down? Or you kind of “eh whateva..” person? Do you have a story about it? Let me know down below. xoxo